Simanaitis Says

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I’M A FAIR PIECE from Millennials age-wise, but it’s fun to see how they’re doing. Here in Part 2, we learn they prefer to go on cheap dates, not to hold a job, rent rather than buy, and eat avocado toast. 

Job Hopping. The PureWow website says, “Struggling to secure pay raises and battling burnout, millennials are job hopping more than ever. And they’re jumping around for good reason. A recent Deloitte workplace study tells us 39 percent of millennials chose jobs that offered better work life balance, 39 percent transitioned to companies that valued their learning and development and 27 percent made the switch to earn a higher salary.”

And Sittervising. PureWow also observes a parenting trend of “sittervising,” letting kids play by themselves, albeit with supervision. The website says, “And so be it if this playdate includes a couple sips of Pinot Noir.”

And there’s “infladating,” the trend of “casual, budget-conscious outings, ditching upscale dinner reservations in favor of quick coffee dates, picnic lunches and walks in the park.” PureWow mentions “phubbing” as well: the lamentable temptation of snubbing someone by fooling with your mobile phone when perfectly nice conversation is an alternative.

Streaming Natives. Millennials have been digital natives since birth. This has affected more than phubbing: Through the use of streaming, it has influenced their concept of ownership. Goldman Sachs notes, “Millennials have been reluctant to buy items such as cars, music, and luxury goods. Instead, they’re turning to a new set of services that provide access to products without the burdens of ownership, given rise to what’s being called a ‘sharing economy.’ ”

Gee, this makes my six shelves of CDs and DVDs look as ancient as er… bookshelves.

Avocado Toast. Shayna Murphy offered “6 Millennial Trends That Are Still Cool—No Matter What Gen Z Says,” in Reviewed, USAToday. It’s from February 2021, but still au courant I’m told. 

“For the uninitiated,” Shayna says, “avocado toast is an absolutely delicious treat wherein you smear freshly mashed avocado onto the bread of your choosing (thick, whole-grain bread usually works best). Sprinkle on a little salt and you’re good to go, although you can get fancy with it and add everything from leafy herbs like cilantro or basil to fried eggs, zesty jalapenos, and more.”

Image from The Spruce Eats. I’d make mine with jalapenos.

Side-Parts. Reviewed and PureWow both mention side-part hair styles. Among millennials,” Shayna says, “side-parts have a storied history. Some of us have been rocking one since our scene kid days back in the mid-to-late 2000s. Yes, that’s not exactly a winning endorsement, but there are still ways to make a side-part work without seeming dated, especially if you’re someone with a square, diamond- or heart-shaped face, as swoopy side-parts may help to soften and frame the more angular features of your visage.”

Shayna continues, “Fans of the middle-part say it’s better for overall facial symmetry—and that’s accurate, if you have a round or oblong-shaped face.”

Geez. I’ve combed my hair with a side-part (left side) all my life. But then I’ve always been pre-au courant. 

In conclusion, this all reminds me of a line in Cunk on Everything: “The best definition of ‘young people’ is anyone whose date of birth makes you think ‘Shit, I was drunk most of that year.’ ” ds 

 © Dennis Simanaitis,, 2023


  1. Andrew G.
    March 28, 2023

    You got me, Dennis. I shouldn’t have read this piece before breakfast. Now I have an urge, but no avocado.

    Would Sherlock Holmes deduce your mother was right-handed, if your hair is parted on the left?

  2. Mike B
    March 28, 2023

    As a kid, I had a side part. That was when I had hair. Now, it’s a middle part, about 3″ wide.

  3. sabresoftware
    March 28, 2023

    Well one thing in common with that bunch. Avocado Toast!

    And a vote for side parted hair.

  4. sabresoftware
    March 28, 2023

    A vote for Avocado Toast here!

    Oh, and left parted hair (or what’s left of it these days).

  5. sabresoftware
    March 28, 2023

    Sorry for the double post, the first one didn’t stick until I sent the second one!

  6. -Nate
    March 29, 2023

    _SO_ glad I’m not young now ! .

    I didn’t have much fun growing up but everything is so fast paced and blah blah blah, old man rant I guess .


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