MISS MANNERS AND TRUMP PART 1

MY MISS MANNERS’ GUIDE TO EXCRUCIATINGLY CORRECT BEHAVIOR is the updated 2005 edition, not that things haven’t changed in the past two decades. In particular, Trump’s reactions to recent Minnesota horrors prompted my return to Miss Manners, also known as Judith Martin. Here’s a recounting of Trump’s utterly callous pronouncements, contrasted with tidbits of behavior suggested by Miss Manners gleaned from a variety of times and sources. Are you surprised that the tidbits comprise Parts 1 and 2 today and tomorrow?

Trump’s Absolutely Despicable Behavior. CBS News reports, “Trump Says He Won’t Call Walz About Minnesota Lawmaker Shootings, Calls Governor ‘Whacked Out,’ ” June 17, 2025. By way of background, the news source writes, “Vance Boelter, 57, faces federal and state charges in the killings of Minnesota Rep. Melissa Hortman and her husband Mark and wounding state Sen. John Hoffman and his wife Yvette. Boelter was captured after a massive, multi-agency manhunt. Authorities say he planned to target other lawmakers and even visited others’ homes the night of the shootings.”

Image from WCCO CBS News Minneapolis. 

WCCO recounts, “The president spoke to reporters early Tuesday aboard Air Force One as he flew back to Washington after abruptly leaving the G7 summit in Canada. The White House said the president wants to better monitor the rising tensions in the Middle East between Israel and Iran. Asked if he planned to call Walz, Trump said the Democratic governor is ‘slick’ and ‘whacked out’ and said, ‘I’m not calling him.’ ”

“Presidents often reach out to other elected officials at times of tragedy to offer condolences,” WCCO suggests. 

The news source continued, “Trump added, ‘The guy doesn’t have a clue. He’s a mess. So, you know, I could be nice and call him, but why waste time?’ ” 

So much for human response, empathy, and compassion. 

Miss Manners, MANA. Back in November 10, 2016, Lisa Gutierrez reported in The Kansas City Star, “Miss Manners in KC: It’s Time to Make America Nice Again.” Gutierrez quoted Judith Martin, ‘Respect for people who have different opinions or different ideas or different backgrounds is an essential American value. And it’s in danger of getting lost…..’ ”

Avoiding an Acrimonious Tone. Gutierrez continued quoting Miss Manners: ‘Two aspects of this unparallelled campaign helped set an acrimonious tone. One is the idea that expressing all your feelings, whether they are presentable or not, is a healthy, good idea. Another one is the contentiousness and the entertainment value of an election where there is all the back and forth and it’s exciting to watch. And it’s drama, but it’s not the way we want to live, to live with that kind of drama.” 

Judith Martin, “Miss Manners.” Her 2016 video can be accessed through The Kansas City Star.  

“So,” Judith Martin said back in 2016, “we’ve had our excitement, and it is time to settle down and be one country and behave ourselves.”

Of course, a lot has happened since 2016.

Miss Manners, 2020. On May 11, 2020, Miss Manners discussed politics in a Bible study group in The Mercury News: “Why Do They Think It’s OK to Bash Trump Supporters?” 

The reader asked, “What is your take on this?” Miss Manners responded, “That you have a good subject for Bible study. There is a great deal in there about how to treat other people. Miss Manners suggests you begin setting an example by refraining from criticizing your leader directly—or condemning entire generations—but instead talking about the temptation, in these politically volatile times, to jeer—or worse—at those with whom we disagree. It might be interesting to the group to examine the virtues and discuss the difficulties of practicing compassion and kindness.”

Compassion and kindness. These were recurrent themes of the Biden administration—and also for Kamala Harris in 2024.

Tomorrow in Part 2, Miss Manners and we continue.

© Dennis Simanaitis, SimanaitisSays.com, 2025