WITH A SONG IN MY HEAD

MAYBE IT’S A BYPRODUCT of whacko Robert F. Kennedy Jr’s brain worm, but Melinda Wenner Moyer writes in The New York Times, September 10, 2024, “Why Can’t I Get This Song Out of My Head? Here’s why earworms are never gonna give you up.” 

A Common Phenomenon. “First, some reassurance,” Melinda says, “You’re not alone. Research suggests that catchy songs that get lodged in your head—colloquially known as earworms—are common, and can happen to people weekly or even daily. ‘Some people wander around with music in their head kind of constantly,’ said Ira Hyman, a psychologist who studies the phenomenon at Western Washington University in Washington State.”

It’s not quite constantly with me, but I certainly experience random earworms, of which more anon.

What Causes Them? Recent listenings, researchers say, but also an occurrence “that reminds you of a particular song, said Callula Killingly, a postdoctoral research fellow who studies earworms at the Queensland University of Technology in Australia. Perhaps someone mentions Madonna, and then you find yourself humming ‘Material Girl,’ ” Melinda says. “Or you take a bite of linguine that tastes exactly like the pasta you ate just before a Taylor Swift concert, and suddenly you’re singing ‘Shake It Off.’ ”

Bless your heart, Melinda, but I believe you’re writing to a difference audience. Though we all have earworm portals, more as likely mine are from a 1930s’ Busby Berkeley musical.

How to Unstick a Song? “Sometimes,” Melinda says, “earworms are perfectly pleasant. But other times, they can be extremely annoying (I’m looking at you, Rick Astley).” 

Er… I pass. 

“Luckily,” Melinda continues, “research suggests a few ways to rid yourself of them.” 

Chewing Gum. A small sample (a mere 18 undergrads) listened to a popular song and then asked not to think of it for three minutes. Melinda describes, “Half of the participants were given gum to “vigorously chew” during the three minutes, and half were not. The participants who chewed gum were less likely to report hearing the song in their heads.”

Gee, I would have been thinking of the “to vigorously chew” split infinitive, but I cannot speak for today’s undergradate sensitivity to English grammar. 

Entering a Mildly Stressful Social Situation. Exactly! That’s what happens to me whenever our language is fractured. Y’know, when people go, like….

Or Just Swapping Songs. Bingo. I was holding off on my own particular earworm experiences, but one of the researchers beat me to it: “Put a different song in there. Choose one you don’t mind.” 

Image by Eric Helgas from The New York Times. Close, but no cigar.

My Mental Record Changer. Indeed, my personal earworm mitigator is to imagine an old-fashioned record changer, the kind with a stack of records on a spindle, the tonearm rising and rotating away from the stack, the next record dropping to the turntable, and the tonearm rotating back and dropping to the first track.

The beauty of my mental record changer is not knowing what the next earworm will be. If it’s equally annoying, simply imagine hitting Rej.

Image by Daniel Cua from YouTube.

Give it a try, Melinda. Just don’t imagine stacking a bunch of Rich Astley platters, who- or whatever he/she/they/it is/are. ds 

© Dennis Simanaitis, SimanaitisSays.com, 2024